FIRST | Expat Eyes

Each expat sees the world differently. It's a result of slowly merging one's cultural norms with a host culture. This forms an entirely unique third culture and perspective of the world. Sometimes it's really hard to articulate this beautiful and complex fusion, which holds such an array of emotions, experiences, joys, and sorrows. But I'm on a journey to share as we look ahead to our return to Oregon in the Summer. I'm not sure where this writing journey will take me, but I'm intrigued to watch it unfold and evolve.

Here's my first compilation of life behind Expat Eyes ...

Thanksgiving Day 2022

1. This picture represents several miracles in my life. First, hosting Thanksgiving this year was a dream! Since before we ever knew of any expats in Hatyai, this is something I wanted to do. God has faithfully placed us in a life-giving community with some truly precious friends. What a joy it was to host our Hatyai family on this special holiday. Second, this little miracle baby's original due date was Thanksgiving Day (November 26, 2020). Already 2 years old, I still can't believe Emelyn (which means "peaceful home") is part of our family. I didn't ever think to pray and ask for her, but God knew we need this curiously spunky little lady in our lives. She completes our family in the most special way. Third, prior to moving to Hatyai, God answered my prayer for a Yeti cooler. We live just north of the Equator at 7° latitude, so it's HOT in the Deep South. Perishable food items go bad fast. Since we don't live in a "tourist" part of Thailand, my thought was to transport perishable food items to our Hatyai home, but I knew a regular cooler could never do that. I remember meeting a dear friend for breakfast one day and she was asking what I'd like to take back to Thailand. I mentioned a Yeti on my list, but didn't think much about it. A couple months later, we were surprised when a Yeti showed up at our house. I couldn't believe it. I was so humbled and in awe by my friend's thoughtfulness, love, and generosity. But I also had no idea how much this Yeti would become part of our normal, every day lives in Hatyai. We use the it all.the.time to transport and preserve frozen & fresh foods. Living on the outskirts of town, when I spend time all day running errands for the family, the Yeti keeps all my frozen food in tact for the whole day. God meets our needs, He does the miraculous, and provides abundance in every situation. God is ever faithful and those who trust in Him lack no good thing!

"Goodbye, Fall Box! See you in 2 years."

2. I packed away my first box with an array of emotions. Sure, we get to experience real Fall next year (which I'm seriously excited about because it's my favorite season and 100x's better than anything I recreate), but this box represents home. I won't see its contents again for 2 years. I will also open it again in a different house and that makes me sad. I have loved our Hatyai home. Now the countdown has begun to when this home will no longer be ours.

The littles loved decorating the mini tree.

3. Fall may be my favorite season of all time, but Christmas is certainly my favorite holiday. We live in a country that doesn't celebrate Christmas and actually, anything Christmas-y you see in Thailand is connected to the Western New Year. Celebrating Christmas gives so many opportunities to share all the joy of the season with friends and neighbors. This year is particularly special too because the littles have been involved with the decorating and celebrating process. That's been a lovely new joy all of its own.

FUN FACT: Thailand celebrates THREE New Years over the course of 4 months: Western New Year, Chinese New Year, and Thai New Year (Songkran festival).

Bright Christmas lights as the day dawns.

4. My days are extraordinarily long with the littles and by the end, when normal people eagerly await to enjoy their Christmas lights, I am eager for bed. Or I sit down and fall asleep because I can't keep my eyes open anymore. Also, Ellie started sneaking into our bed in the middle of the night, which wakes me up, and thus starts my mornings early. Though I prefer to be a night person, early mornings have become a sweet silence before the storm (aka noisy toddlers). This month my early mornings are certainly made more magical with the quiet of Christmas lights and candles.

Wrangling the littles out of the fridge.

5. You may wonder what's actually happening in this picture because it does look rather bizarre. Let me first explain the insanity that is our kitchen. The counters and sink are too low for a tall person, while the cabinets above are too high for us to reach on our own (my husband is 6 ft. and I'm 5 ft. 7 in.). We don't have a pantry, so everything must be stored on the higher shelves. This insanity requires a step ladder to be available at all times to reach most everything in our kitchen. Both littles understand this concept now, and our daily battle is keeping the girls out of all the stuff they aren't supposed to touch. Pretty much nothing is off limits with the ladder, and so the great kitchen battle is one we are constantly fighting, particularly in the rainy season months.

Rainy garbage days always get me down.

6. About two years into living in our neighborhood, we finally got garbage pick up. We used to have to drive all our garbage to the entry of our neighborhood. It was taxing to say the least, so having garbage pick up weekly is such a huge blessing. This, however, also comes with certain challenges. The first is that the garbage truck tumbles down our street at 2 am, which is anything but quiet. Middle of the night garbage pickup makes sense when you consider how hot it is during the day and how smelly it must be for those working in this industry. Second, they ALWAYS have to leave the lid open to prove the garbage was picked up. This bleeds over into other random areas of life in Thailand, where the "experts" must show proof of a job well done (including surgeries, but that's a story for another day). I thought nothing of it until rainy season hit. Now we have to constantly dump water out of our trash can, which is pretty gross considering that all the trash gets baked from the heat. Needless to say, sometimes even the best solutions come with their own odd problems.

Dark clouds make for great silhouettes.

7. Rainy days make for unique dynamics. In a way, rainy season feels like Portland, so with the holiday decor, soups, and baking, it feels very homey. On the other hand, the girls go stir-crazy because they adore exploring the outdoors. Swampy yards and playgrounds make for a miserable day of indoor play for them. We have extremely limited indoor play options and when the flooding is too extreme, we can't even get to those options. I'm learning to accept my limitations and walk in God's grace over these matters. I've tried a lot of years to be the ideal mom, exciting, fun, and full of creativity with greatest ideas. It turns out though that I can only be me and I can only do what I'm able to do. So I'm learning to accept the good, work on the bad, and create beauty in the middle of the mess.

This year's cookie favorites!

8. I love making Christmas sugar cookies, especially in Thailand to share with our friends. Typical Thai desserts involve fresh fruit or tapioca/ potato/ taro in coconut milk. You rarely see Western desserts in the stores and if you did, they will most likely disappoint. Last year I accidentally made 120+ cookies from a recipe I'd never tried. Because we made so many, we gave a lot away and our friends loved them. So this year, I made more to give away and they were once again a HUGE hit. I love finding tangible ways to love on and bless our Thai friends. I also love the special time I get with my oldest daughter. This year I introduced her to Gwyneth Paltrow's Emma while decorating cookies, which was the real treat.

Keeping the littles busy so we can enjoy a sermon.

9. Life with these littles turned our world upside down. Two years into this journey, we're still figuring out our normal. Truth is I don't think normal exists for our family. Expat life is fluid. One can never truly feel settled because the next big transition and change is always on the horizon. If there's one thing the pandemic taught us, there are no certainties in life. Admittedly, there's a level of exhaustion that comes with understanding this. Nonetheless, there is always space to create beauty, start traditions, and stitch joy into the fabric of our family. Life may appear messy and chaotic most days, but by God's grace, every season brings new life. This year a friend told me that we are simply responsible for stewarding the moments God brings our way, so that's what I keep putting at the forefront of every decision, particularly as I watch my littles grow and discover the world for themselves.

Dog-pile on the mommy.

10. There was a moment today where Ellie asked to go on an adventure and then stated that we will come back "because this is our home!" It hit me hard and I almost burst into tears. There are so many things I love about our life overseas, but knowing what's coming for my girls next year hurts my heart. Will their sweet dispositions change? Will all the good that's been planted be uprooted when this transition hits? Jesus' yoke is easy and His burden is light, so that I can give up all that burdens me. I choose to trust Him when I don't understand and feel uncertain about the future. I choose to trust His steadfast love and believe the truth of His Word, that His promises are sure. When I'm down, I know He will lift me up.

"But you, O LORD, are a shield about me, my glory, and the lifter of my head." Psalm 3:3

When questions fill my heart and mind, help me to hand my burdens to You, Jesus. I cannot stop the change that is to come, but I know You will carry us every step of the way. Help me slow down and steward the moments in front of me instead of worrying about the future. No one knows the future except for You. In Jesus' name, Amen.